Keeping Faith

As I prepare myself for my surgery that will happen later tonight I found myself in deep thought. Praying harder than I have before for all to go well. Then it dawned on me. Have you ladies ever asked why me? Then noticed we are not just a women with high pain tolerance, We're all strong women period. Even at our worst lying on floors curled up in pain, crying in agony. That is not a sign We're weak. God or who ever you choose to believe gave us this because we can handle it more than the women next to us.
     Seriously, any women I've known with endometriosis has possessed strong characteristics. We're able to say, " all right that was bad but I really need to get this chore, errand, work, study and etc... done." We may pause then just go about our day. Then I noticed something deeper. Which just may be me who feels it but my Faith is what has truly picked me up and pulled me through this last 7 month's on this injection. Faith has been my greatest strength through it all.

    Yes, it is good to have friend's, husband's, wives and family help us through and support us. What if they fail? Faith is the one consistent thing in our lives.  I'm going to hold on tight to this thought today. Think positive, keep the Faith. 

Depressed state of mind

  Seventh injection! Really I would jump up and down if I had the emotion to care. Yep girl's depression has hit hard. Here I sit waiting to feel something As the world moves about me. I've got nothing except for extreme nervousness for my up and coming surgery.
    So as promised I've kept this going for six months with a bonus round. Here are some questions you and I had about being on Zoladex.
    1.) Weight Gain: yes, but only 5 pounds Ladies and that was only because I ate poorly the last two months. Actually lost the four of the five gained this month. Working out helped. Dr. Said I was one of the healthiest patient's on Zoladex with little weight gain. He has seen it go as far as 20 pounds. Some lose, some gain. Take care of yourself you will do fine. Not as bad as we thought.
    2.) Lack of sex drive: yes and no. Went in waves. As long as your partner who show's great compassion you will be fine. Vaginal dryness is a yes, so lubrication is a most.
    3.) Depression: check, check , Check. Don't let this get you down. Herbal teas will help. Try not to get stressed out. Easier said then done. My down fall was a loss of a family member and relationship woes. This stuff does make you irrational. Suggestions have a friend you can bounce those crazy thoughts too. This helps you through the crazy.
    4.) Hot Flashes: um running around naked and laying in a snow bank sound's divine at this point. YES!! Be prepared they suck! Light breathable clothes. Alcohol makes them flare up more. Still will take it over my period.
    5.) Insomnia: Yes! Your so tired during day. Due to hot flashes as you sleep and mind constantly going you barely sleep.
     6.) Pain: Here and there. Had one feel like I was in labor. Yes, that is common. Lovely right. Went away in a few hour's. We've had worse pain girls. Feel some cramping but the more crappy eating I did the more I felt it.
    7.) Headaches: yes keep advil handy their frequent enough to be a pain in the behind.
    8.) Mood changes: YES your a "B*#ch". No joke it is hard to handle your temper. Becareful. Go scream in a pillow, walk away. Foot in mouth a lot. You don't even mean it, no filter slips out.

So there you have it. I'll write more later this week. Here you are. Hoping this has been helpful.  There was a funny part to this last injection. The nurse taking my blood pressure. " wow your hot! No your burning up!" Me, " giggle, this is just the start of my hot flash. Haven't even broke into a sweat yet." The nurse mouth dropped. She gave me my blood pressure numbers. ( awesome by the way) walked away shaking her head. Think I scared her right out of hot flashes.
Hang in there ladies. There is a light At The end of this path.